Fable 3: Thanks a Bunch for Wasting My Time

CONTAINS MINI SPOILERS. Just in case anyone in the world hasnt played it yet.
Dear Lionhead:
Less time on trailers, more time on game.
I am still faithful. But I wish you would work harder and screw around less.
Achievements are funny. But i would rather not go through the whole game looking for one chest item only to find that it only appears randomly in certain people's games. I dont want to get on the xbox network just to get the color of paint that i wanted to use on my underwear.
The storyline had promise in 3 but you ruined it by cutting it off early (literally). 365 days?! fuck you. To win i would have had to stand around for hours waiting for rent to come in and fixing up my properties. (WHICH I HAD TO DO ONE BY ONE?) There was NO OTHER WAY to make money. Admit it. Playing the fucking lute was a waste of time. especially with the way the engine lagged. Fines for killing citizens? Fuck that. Being evil was a horrid horrible stupid struggle to even finish the damn game. YOU CANT FINE ME. I AM EVIL. Then you have to stand there playing the lute for 7 hours just to work off your debt for killing one measly citizen. That fuckwit started it anyway... It wasn't my fault that I had to go and endanger myself after having to flirt and dance with him and often fart in his face (he liked it like that?) JUST TO BE HIS MOTHERFUCKING FRIEND. Yeah. Screw you. I am just going to go and kill goblins for a reason that doesn't have anything to do with you.
Sword? I have no sword. Melee was useless. The only person that i ever watched play a melee weapon for serious was one of those people who you want to scream at because they will not leave any stone unturned in a game. Playing melee wasn't to challenge yourself, playing melee was a way to torture and keep you from ever completing the game ever.
Magic on the other hand was cheerfully overpowered. once you upgraded all the way, two hits? Yeah screw the 'You are in serious danger' music. I am not in serious danger. Ever. Enemies only prove to be annoying obsticals in the way of you and finding all 300 possessed gnomes. I DID however like the spellweaving. I know that this adds to a lot of the overpoweredness of the magic but, it looked really cool to throw a level 3 ice and wind. I usually did it when there were no enemies around. The best combo was Fire and wind.
Your brother is a pussy. Let's just leave it at that.
Your citizens are ignorant AI douchebags. DON'T LOOSE THE GAME. THEY WILL NEVER EVER FORGIVE YOU EVER EVER. 'Look guys. I know that orphans are kindof a big deal. But we really needed that building for prostitutes. See that wooden sword you are holding? Yeah, Charmaigne here paid for that.'
I am not a deadbeat. I just didnt get enough gameplay time to wait for people to pay their rent. (365 FUCKING DAYS???? FUCK THAT SHIT.)
Afterwards though, i just let the game sit and went to work. When i came back i stood on my pile of money in my palace all alone except for my daughter whose dad i stole from some other random wench, and wondered why i didnt do this 345 days ago when i had a chance. Oh, that's right. I didn't get a warning. I just got bombarded with hard decisions for '365' days. Now because i DIDN'T drain Bowerstone lake and allow Reaver to freely feed on everyone's souls, they all hate me?
I think we can retire Theresa now. Thanks for making her a random, removed character in this game. Just like everyone else in the AI. I felt no connection to her whatsoever. The only characters that i felt ANYTHING twards were:
Walter Beck: Father figure, even though he isn't. I actually cried a little at the end.
Reaver: C'mon. how can you NOT love how much you hate this fucker?
Elliot/Elise: The only attractive NPCs in the game. Except for Ben Finn. But he is a major dick.

And so, Lionhead, if you could stop dicking around with acheivements and work on the social interactions so that i dont have to choose between flirting with someone im not into but need to forge a lasting relationship with and farting in their face, that would make "Fable:The Journey" so much better.

-This has been a rant brought to you by colorWIRED

TIME TO TAKE MY OWN BLOG VIRGINITY!

Hello.
My name is colorWIRED.
No, that is not my birth name for all of you who are here to try and figure out who I am! (You know who you are)

colorWIRED is my alias on the interwebz. And you can find me most anywhere. I am also an artist on deviantart, etsy, society6, a Youtuber, a Facebooker and a Tumblrer.

DEVIANTART is my main hub! However, all of my compiled internet information about where i will be appearing and for information on streams and commissions will come from facebook.

THIS IS A GAMER BLOG. However it is not meant to be taken seriously. As the title says, this is a 5 minute, first impressions blog. It only takes me about 5 minutes to know if i like the mechanics, society, and general flow of a game! Sometimes, i go back on my words and redownload the game to try it again. Most of my experience is with FTP MMORPGs. I know there are a lot of people out there who can't, or in my case, don't want to afford the pay to play games. I have tried some, and YES, THEY ARE BETTER. Don't get me wrong. If I had all of the money and time in the world, My list would include titles like EVE, TERA, Guild Wars, Borderlands 1+2, Dragon Age... I could go on for hours.

But since i dont have all of that money and time, I will spend this time blogging about my first impressions of all of the FTPs that I try. Don't be turned off by this. If you are gtfo. Every once in a while, i will recieve a gift or a demo of a game (I hate demos with a burning passion but still play them) I will also throw those reviews up here too.

I AM NOT A PROFESSIONAL. I am a dance instructor, a cashier and a backwaiter in the city that i live in. I am not legally allowed to be a professional gamer too. I would probably get shot if I claimed it XD.

SO ENJOY. I am a cynical, sarcastic person who loves mages and setting things on fire. I have little patience and love a good storyline! This ought to be interesting... at least for me

MARVELOUS
-colorWIRED